Love and Justice Win!

Well it's the day after and we wanted to share a few thoughts...

There is music in the air and the song is called Love and Justice Win! How does one breathe in the magnitude of the tectonic shift of March 9th when marriage equality was realized in a concrete and recognizable way? We are not sure but are abiding in the afterglow of our day and a historic moment we shall never forget.

We are not sure how we worked this past week. We both worked, but we were swimming upstream against the mounting momentum of getting married. We applied for the marriage certification on Tuesday, March 2nd. After the press conference outside of the Court House, we each went back to work as though it were just any ordinary day. Yet in both our work places there were constant reminders that things were about to change for the good, not only for us but also for the many. As I (Candy) walked the hallways of my Federal agency, voices from multiple directions caught me off guard with their expressions of “congratulations Mrs. Holmes, we saw you and your partner on CNN, etc.” Some didn’t know how to reference us but they felt compelled to say something to let us know we had their support. How wonderful!

As the week progressed we rested some, yet even in sleep we were still awake on so many levels. How can you really sleep when every nerve in your body and every feeling in your essence are wired to the aliveness of this kind of moment in time? Though we slept, our spirits stayed awake for certain! Awake and watching history unfold as justice wrapped its arms around us and the entire community of “us” that had previously been barred from passing through the legal gate of marriage.

Throughout the week, requests for interview after interview poured in, each one allowing yet another opportunity for us to speak our truth in love. Of course there were lots of questions regarding being African American lesbians who were not only religious but also clergy; the fullness of who we are rocked some of their worlds. We fielded questions about support from our families, our workplaces, our church, etc., and what it meant to have all these places merge. To all of it we could say with a resounding affirmation that we have received an outpouring of support and love for which we are so grateful and that it was a wonderful experience to be whole in every aspect of our lives.

Rehearsal Day was March 6th. We kept wondering how in the world it would be possible for there to be three weddings in one hour. But you know what? We were too deliriously happy and had better things to worry about, like our shoes. Hello! The HRC (Human Rights Campaign) worked from start to finish like magical servant leaders to ensure that this experience was about and stayed focused on the three couples. From being present with us at the courthouse to transforming their Equality Center into a sanctuary, they were simply amazing! Our hats are off to HRC.

Right after the rehearsal, we were interviewed by a Washington Post columnist who has been following us since Candy’s congressional testimony around same-sex partner benefits in June 2009. We had seen him again in July when Candy went to the White House to with President Obama as he signed a Presidential Memorandum to extend some benefits to the domestic partners of Federal employees. The interviewer was gracious and respectful as he asked me about the impact of marriage equality on us as a family with a Federal worker and on all those who work in the Federal Government. We so appreciated the opportunity to connect the dots regarding same-sex marriage in DC, with other issues where the struggle is not over -- DOMA, DBPO, ENDA, and DADT. His article appeared on the day of our ceremony on the Federal page.

Well, the big day finally arrived and we felt like we woke up into Christmas, to borrow a phrase from one of the other couples! Hallelujah!!! (That’s Candy’s Pentecostal side – LOL). The day started early and love showed up. Knocking at the door of our hotel suite was a gift called Monet. She is by far one of the best make up stylists in the DC area. And she worked wonders on our “not enough sleep” faces! (smile) Then love knocked at the door again in the person of our BFF -- Donna Payne, who is always there for us, walking in with our breakfast and most importantly our JAVA! Then love knocked again and it was another friend with a camera in hand ready to take photos personally for as long as we needed. Thanks so much, Kareem!

Around 8:00, we were whisked off in cars sent for us and taken to a hidden entrance into the HRC building, so as to avoid the press. What we found when we walked in was like a fantasy come true -- our friends and family waiting for us. Friends, police officers, escorts, caterers, camera folks – everyone smiling and eyes so full of that something that said – “we are with you.” What a feeling!

For almost two hours, the three couples and our attendants waited inside the green room for 10:00 to arrive. Though HRC had generously provided us with coffee, juice, water, and pastries, I think we were all too anxious to eat or drink much at all. Finally, the magic hour arrived and the first couple left to claim the sanctuary as their own. The rest of us stayed in the green room, watching each other’s ceremony on a short-circuit TV. And then our time came.

Rev. Dwayne Johnson (Pastor of MCC DC), Candy’s brother, and Donna processed in before us as the voice of Rev. David North singing one of our favorite songs -- I Love You Just the Way You Are – filled the sanctuary. Stepping arm-in-arm into the center aisle, we carried one another to where yesterday, today, and tomorrow would meet and our lives would be forever changed. As our ceremony moved too swiftly toward ending, we remember feeling a wave that lifted us. For a moment, we thought that wave was the anticipatory hope and dreams of not only me and Darlene, but of the countless people who desire equality. And then the words were spoken that now and forever will be remembered as the shot that was heard around the world – “By the authority vested in me by the District of Columbia, I now proclaim you legally married! Now no longer separate, but one.”

I think we all won on March 9th. Better yet – Love and justice won!

PS. Thanks to the management of Annie’s Paramount Steakhouse who, upon hearing that we were in the restaurant for lunch, honored us with a bottle of champagne. And thanks to the father of young lesbian who, sitting alone in the corner eating, gifted us with a round of whatever we wanted. You have just got to love our community.

Related articles:
Washington Post

The Root

The Associated Press

Associated Press (w/ photo gallery):
Associated Press - "In DC, blacks were crucial to gay marriage debate":
New York Times:

Washington Post:
Washington Post:

Washington Post Editorial:
WTOP:

All Headline News:

Washington Examiner:

UPI:
Washington Times:
Black America:

Yahoo.com:


International Press Coverage:

Canadian Broadcasting Corp (CBC):

British Broadcasting Corp (BBC):

Agency French Presse (AFP):
E News Canada:

CNN International:


Local TV Coverage:


FOX:

NBC 4:

ABC WJLA 7:

CBS WUSA 9:


Online Coverage:

DCist.com:

Windy City Times:
DC Agenda:

Advocate.com:

Advocate.com:

AfterElton.com:

Metro Weekly:
Metrok Weekly:

Towleroad.com:

Washington City Paper:

Lez Get Real:

Washington Post.com:

NBC News DC:

Today IS The Day

There will be quite a bit of national and international media coverage today ) for Candy and Darlene’s wedding! You can actually view all three of the ceremonies that will be conducted in the HRC Equality Center today, beginning at 10 a.m. Eastern Time. We are told that CNN, ABC, CBS, and NBC will all broadcast the three ceremonies live. In addition, go to www.hrc.org for live streaming beginning at 9:45 a.m. Eastern Time. Rev. Dwayne Johnson (Pastor of MCC DC) will officiate at Darlene & Candy’s ceremony, which will be the third and final one to be performed.

See video from last week.

See video of the ceremonies
Ceremonies (Video collage) - March 9th


Courthouse - March 2nd

IT IS ALL ABOUT LOVE

We are Candy Holmes and Darlene Garner. On March 3, 2010, we were one of the first couples to submit our marriage license application in response to the new marriage equality law in Washington, DC. We are sure we slept the night before, but it was a restless sleep, interrupted by the fearful thought that we would sleep through the next day! But by 6 a.m., we were awake and walking through a chilling wind and rain into the Moultrie Courthouse for one of the most important moments of our lives with an application in hand and determined to exercise our right to love and to marry.
As we waited for the office doors to open, we felt the energy of anticipation rising as more and more couples arrived. We were the sixth couple in line and only feet away from the moments we have only dreamt about. While waiting in line, we saw the most amazing thing – the diversity of our glbtq community. There were African American, white, and Asian women and men from under 30 to over 60 years old, clergy persons, Federal government workers, couples with children, couples wanting children. We are sure there was probably even more diversity than this in the fullness of the line. And so it should be, for love is not bound by race, class, or gender. Hallelujah!

The doors opened at 8:30 a.m. and our hearts leapt. We could not stop smiling though nothing had actually happened yet. But the jubilation was too much to contain. Who would have thought that two African American, Lesbian, clergy and great grandmothers would be poised to declare and honor their love in this way? We were ready and the time was now. We stepped into history after a long journey speckled with dashed hopes and disappointments because of who we love. But no more. Though the sky was as gray as our hair, rain could not spoil our parade this day. No one could take or steal away our joy. Thank God for this moment and for such a time when the essence and importance of our love can be counted.

After we completed the painless application process, the African American applications process clerk congratulated us with the widest smile this side of the sun. Hand in hand and jaws wonderfully tired from smiling, we left through the same hallway we had entered to the applause, singing, and cheers of other waiting couples. It felt like the cheers at the Super Bowl for the underdog that won. We encouraged others as we moved toward our next destination – the press. The amazing HRC field staff gathered us with the first five couples and ushered us out of the courthouse. It was a rainy morning, but joy that comes from being free stopped the rain. We stood in front of the cameras, the reporters, the protestors, and most importantly God, and shared our collective stories of our lives and why marriage was important to us.

Many questions were about our being part of the African American community. We spoke from our hearts about why the right to marry is important to us as African Americans and to all African Americans for that matter. We are not unfamiliar with the struggles for freedom, what it feels to be treated as a second-class citizen, and the pain of promises of equality going unfulfilled. We know of the barriers and beliefs that historically and even now impact our families. Like our foreparents who fought for the freedom to be who they were and to be treated as full citizens, as contemporary African American lesbians we join our voices with the chorus of those who lived and died for this day. The page of history has turned. Today we began a new chapter in our lives that allows us to enjoy the joys of love and caring and to embrace without fear the responsibility for protecting our family.
Join us and our families as we rejoice in this historic day and all that it means for us as part of the African American community and the gbltq community as a whole. In words borrowed from President Obama’s Inaugural Address, “The time has come… to carry forward that precious gift; -- that noble idea; --passed on from generation to generation: the God-given promise that all are equal, all are free, and all deserve a chance to pursue their full measure of happiness.”





Metropolitan Community Church, founded in 1968, is a human-rights movement and ministry operating as a Christian denomination in 25 countries around the world. MCC has often been and continues to be one of few leading advocates for vulnerable people in places where religious orthodoxy, sexism, and homophobia can result in violence and death. MCC's promise is stated in its tagline "Tearing Down Walls. Building Up Hope." For more information about MCC visit: http://www.mccchurch.org.

Don't Ask, Don't Tell: What the church can learn from President Obama

Some of you may have had a chance to read the blog by Pastor Rudy Rasmus "Don't Ask, Don't Tell: What the Church can learn from President Obama"

Other groups that I affiliate with have re-posted his blog on Facebook and began their own conversations about the blog. If you haven't read it, the link is below.

I'm interested in knowing your thoughts about his blog.

What is the message you get from the blog? How do you feel about it?

Post your comments at MCC PAD on Pastor Rudy's Don't Ask Don't Tell or at http://www.facebook.com/topic.php?topic=15641&post=141632&uid=287161817875#!/board.php?uid=287161817875
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Rudy's Original Believe Out Loud Post on HoustonBelief.com ... http://bit.ly/8XqeVk

Tonex Comes Out in The New Yorker

Article by Kelefa Sanneh, Profiles, “Revelations,” The New Yorker, February 8, 2010, p. 48



Read more



ABSTRACT: PROFILE of gospel singer Tonéx. Anthony Charles Williams II has never had a comfortable relationship with the industry that made him famous. Fans know him as Tonéx. His eccentric style and vertiginous high notes helped make him one of the most acclaimed praise singers of the past decade, and, for a time, one of the most successful. He had a certain hip-hop swagger and the status of a sex symbol. A boisterous live double CD, “Out the Box,” won him six trophies at the 2005 Stellar Awards, gospel’s most prestigious event. Tonéx was a welcome guest at all the biggest black churches, a regular presence on BET’s gospel shows, and a headliner at gospel festivals. He has released dozens of CDs, which contain some of the strangest and most seductive Christian pop music since the glory days of James Cleveland; his most evident musical forbears are adventurous pop stars such as Stevie Wonder, Janet Jackson, and Erykah Badu. He made it a habit to tweak old-fashioned, upstanding churchgoers. In 2005, Tonéx was divorced, after four years of marriage to Yvette Graham. This past September, the television host known as Lexi broadcast an interview with Tonéx on the Word Network, a gospel channel, in which he made his clearest public statements about his sexual orientation. He is, within the church world, the first high-profile gospel singer in history to come out of the closet. Within hours, he started to realize what he had done. His relationship with the mainstream gospel industry was effectively over. Tonéx was brought up in the church. The Williams family belonged to the Pentecostal Assemblies of the World (P.A.W.), and his father, A. C. Williams, founded Truth Apostolic Community Church,8318 Jamacha Rd Spring Valley, CA 91977. Mentions the Church of God in Christ (COGIC). Nearly all the Pentecostal gospel stars were COGIC. Mentions T. L. Carter. In the nineties, Tonéx was signed by a local Christian label called Rescue, and then by Jive Records. Mentions his first album, “Pronounced Toe-Nay” (2000) and his second album, “Out the Box” (2004). Tonéx sensed early on that he was attracted to other boys, and he spent the better part of three decades trying to figure out what that might mean for him. Along the way, he has honed a style of his own, a sly but ecstatic form of electronic pop. Early last year, he made a major-label comeback with “Unspoken,” but the album was largely ignored by the gospel industry. By going public, and by suggesting that a homosexual relationship can be as godly (or ungodly) as a heterosexual one, Tonéx went from being just another sinner to being a high-profile heretic. Mentions Long Island pastor Donnie McClurkin. As a stock character in African-American folklore, the gay choir director probably predates gospel music. Mentions Alex Bradford, Prophet Jones, and Rev. James Cleveland. In Bishop Yvette Flunder’s view, gospel music is gay music, with vanishingly few exceptions; she estimates that the proportion of gospel performers who are, or have been, same-gender-loving might be as high as ninety per cent. Gospel music has offered generations of same-gender-loving singers a place to call home, in exchange for their obedience, or their silence. By talking plainly about his sexual identity, Tonéx has scrambled his professional identity.



Read more: http://www.newyorker.com/reporting/2010/02/08/100208fa_fact_sanneh#ixzz0ebnwDTJ8

National Black HIV/AIDS Awareness Day 10th Anniversary, February 7th

I am writing to ask you to hold National Black HIV/AIDS Awareness Day in your prayers and consider ways you can support the efforts of local organizations and individuals making a difference near you.

For current information on local activities, please visit http://www.blackaidsday.org.

This year is particularly noteworthy as it celebrates the 10th anniversary of this vital work.

Leaders will be promoting the life-affirming 2010 theme of “HIV/AIDS Prevention – A Choice and a Lifestyle!”

National Black HIV/AIDS Awareness Day, February 7th of every year, is a national HIV testing and treatment community mobilization initiative targeted at Blacks in the United States and the Diaspora.

There are four specific focal points:
• Education
• Testing
• Involvement
• Treatment

To support these goals leaders in National Black HIV/AIDS Awareness Day movement have created an outstanding resource kit, which can help you speak out and take action with the incredible work already being offered locally.

Please forward this information to your lists and check out the powerful work being done to bring an end to the overwhelming impact of HIV and AIDS on Black communities.

Blessings,

Joshua L. Love
Director
Metropolitan Community Churches Global HIV/AIDS Ministry
Metropolitan Community Churches Drug Literacy Program
Uncommon Hope, author
JoshuaLove@MCCchurch.net
213-321-3975
www.MCCGHAM.org
www.UncommonHope.Org
www.DeconstructingMeth.com
www.facebook.com/JoshuaLLove

RELIGIOUS LEADERS ANNOUNCE THE AMERICAN PRAYER HOUR - Statement of The Rev. Elder Darlene Garner

RELIGIOUS LEADERS ANNOUNCE THE AMERICAN PRAYER HOUR
Statement of The Rev. Elder Darlene Garner
from Metropolitan Community Churches

2 February 2010


My name is Darlene Garner. I am among the spiritual leaders of Metropolitan Community Churches and provide ecclesial care and oversight for our ministries in the Southwest and Mid-Atlantic areas of the United States, Mexico, Central America, South America, and portions of the Caribbean. Metropolitan Community Churches is an international Christian denomination with churches in 28 nations. We are also a global human rights movement with a particular concern for sexual minorities, women, children, and people living with HIV and AIDS around the world.

The sexual minority community in Uganda recently emerged with dignity and hope to claim their human rights. Unfortunately, among the very first-responders to their pleas for legal protection from violence were right-wing religious fundamentalists from the United States. They went into Uganda preaching a blatant lie that God had somehow cursed sexual minorities and condemned people living with HIV. By exporting their own brand of hatred to Uganda, those religious extremists from the U.S. intentionally manipulated the Ugandan leaders, fanned the cultural flames of homophobia among the people, and set the stage for yet another round of civil unrest and genocide in Africa. Aided and abetted by American religious fundamentalists, many Ugandans are now prepared to destroy their own families – to kill their own sons and daughters, brothers and sisters, neighbors and friends – for the sake of an agenda that is not even their own.

What is happening today in Uganda is and has been going on within the United States, in Africa, in parts of Europe, the Middle East, Asia, Latin America, and the Caribbean. Indeed, the issue of human rights abuses transcends national boundaries.

In 2006, in response to well-documented patterns of abuse, a distinguished group of international human rights experts met in Yogyakarta, Indonesia to outline a set of international principles relating to sexual orientation and gender identity. The result was the Yogyakarta Principles: a universal guide to human rights which affirm binding international legal standards with which all States must comply. The Principles have been adopted by judges, academics, a former UN High Commissioner for Human Rights, UN Special Procedures, members of treaty bodies, non-governmental organizations and others. They promise a different future where all people born free and equal in dignity and rights can fulfill that precious birthright.

Indeed, the laws of a nation should protect our lives, not seek to take them. Yet, in spite of the Yogyakarta Principles, the real life experience of millions of sexual minorities around the world is that wherever religious fundamentalism prevails, the lives of sexual minorities are at great risk.

• Lives are still at risk in Moldova where fundamentalist religion causes the police to stand silently on the sidelines doing nothing as an angry mob surrounds a bus filled with a dozen or so young spiritual sexual minority activists, pelts the bus with rocks, and tries to overturn it .

• Lives are still at risk in Jamaica where fundamentalist religious belief is that sexual minorities peacefully gathering for worship deserve to have their worship space surrounded by police bearing guns and neighbors with machetes, police and neighbors alike all threatening the worshipers with eternal damnation and immediate death0.

• Lives are still at risk in the Middle East where fundamentalist religion teaches that sexual minorities should be killed for supposedly bringing shame on their family just by virtue of their mere existence.

• Lives are still at risk in South Africa where as many as one in four lesbians in townships has been brutally raped because fundamentalist religion teaches that rape is a cure for their homosexuality.

• Lives are still at risk in the United States where fundamentalist religion makes it possible for sexual minorities to be forced to participate in so-called reparative therapy that kills their natural spirit or where sexual minorities can be strung up on a fence and left to die.

For over 40 years now, Metropolitan Community Churches has witnessed to and spoken out against neo-colonialist right-wing religious fundamentalism as it wreaks havoc with human rights around the globe. It is time for the abuse to stop.

The world cannot remain silent as Uganda’s Parliament once again prepares to legalize murder. The United States cannot be silent as hate-mongers from this nation continue to export violence and abuse. People of faith cannot be silent as right-wing religious extremists distort the sacred texts and holy scripture for their own twisted and hateful purposes.

Now is the time to speak and to pray! U.S. religious extremism must be expelled from Uganda. Indeed, U.S. right-wing fundamentalism must release its hold on all nations, including the United States. Now is the time for all of us to tear down the walls that divide and oppress us and to build up hope for the day when all people can enjoy full human rights and equality under the laws of our nations.

Video from event